Round the Rough Edges

I just wanted to stop by here very briefly to remind us all to treat folks with respect and kindness.

A lot of the time we get in situations where we are working on a project in groups and we don’t like how other members are doing their part. In our head we saw that portion of the project being completed in a totally different way. We worry if the effort or research or changes that they are implementing will really be as effective as what we would have done. Or straight up, that is not how you would have done “x”, whatever that is, and so you hate it…

But

before we start griping or telling them they are wrong, listen and see what their vision is for what y’all are doing. Have them explain to you their thought process for their portion of the experiment so that you can understand. Or just let them worry about their own business and you mind yours because if they are working towards the same goal you all discussed then their plan is to reach that goal anyway.

As a self-diagnosed perfectionist, this is something that I have been working on over the past few years. Efficiency is my friend. It is my lover. Do something right and to the end. See things through and they will be good. But when you work with others they can’t hear your inner monologue or see your inner big picture. Also other folks do not consider processes in the same way that you do. We all have our own ideas. So, sometimes it is better to let them sink or fly by themselves. Then you can come back and sand/perfect the rough edges yourself. Refine the final project together and then turn in your collaborative finished result.

Me not letting someone carry out their vision might make the project “perfect” to me but it might ruin the vibe and relationship you have with your project partner in the long run and that will be harder to repair.

So, when you find yourself in this situation try and take a step back, evaluate, and reevaluate, and then see where you can fit into their vibe and move forward.